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Lauren Elyce

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(no subject) [Dec. 9th, 2013|01:04 pm]
Lauren Elyce

comment to be added.
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(no subject) [Mar. 16th, 2011|09:53 pm]
Lauren Elyce
[Current Mood |calmcalm]

just hanging out with the pup...
$600 shopping spree this weekend woop woop

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(no subject) [Dec. 14th, 2010|07:31 pm]
Lauren Elyce
[Current Music |Mark Ronson - Somebody to love me]

sometimes i seriously feel like my entire life is moving in this giant circle and every now and then I look around and think..'oh...i've been here before...'
and even though i've made the same mistake before and i recognise when I'm about to do it again, I still open the door I think is the right one only to realise that I never had the option to begin with.

The same things keep happening with the same outcomes and the same consequences and the same remarks from me and this isn't any kind of progresssion or growing up or growing in any direction at all...
its not even movement. Just my head getting heavy from the same damn thing.

and the whole thing is a joke so the only thing I can do is laugh and hope to hell that it fools everyone else...or maybe just that it fools me.

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(no subject) [Nov. 13th, 2010|07:22 pm]
Lauren Elyce

waiting for jord to wake up so we can go to dinner.
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(no subject) [Sep. 11th, 2010|11:53 pm]
Lauren Elyce
Clean skin,
Clean teeth,
Fresh air.

It is starting. It has started already. The smell of summer is getting stronger in the air and I am behind but I am catching up. Tonight I cleansed the bullshit from my skin and head and after a long sleep I will cleanse everything else.
Tomorrow morning I will wake up, wash my face and get to the gym. Go to work, get some coffee and some fresh flowers. Come home and start on my room. Purge everything from my old room, my old life, my old restraints and throw out everything that means little to me and create a space that I can live in. Breathe in. Become in.
Tomorrow is a fresh day. Fresh food, fresh water, fresh ideas coming together tomorrow and the next day and the next so that when summer does come, when it is here, I am there with it.
I don’t want to be the summer from last year or the one before. I am ready for my summer, my freedom, my late sunset nights with only the shadow of the day rather than the shadow of all the things that have kept me back.
All the days in the last few years, all the minutes and the hours and the moments I spent wondering when have all led up to this. I am so ready I am here I am here and I’m so awake to this that I am excited for the first time in a long time – that light at the end of the tunnel, the one that everyone speaks about? The one that I thought about for few precious seconds and then dismissed as another of those sayings that doesn’t apply to me, just like eating the crusts of my toast will make my hair grow curly.
But now, tonight, it is here, right in front of me, not just glowing or shining but burning with a fury so close that I can feel its heat on my face. I feel like a child that has found something special, a treasure that for once I don’t want to show to everyone but just want to keep it for myself. Because it is mine. This time it is mine.
And I won’t waste it. I won’t waste this moment. I won’t waste tonight or tomorrow or the next day.

Clean skin,
Clean teeth,
Fresh air.

Go to sleep. Wake up.
Sun will be shining just for you. Just for me.

Just for me.
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(no subject) [Sep. 11th, 2010|10:21 pm]
Lauren Elyce
But my heart still
Beats both blue and blood red
The ups and downs, in and outs
Not black or white, but grey's
The shade we made
When you'd kiss me and say
So long, see you tonight
When you mean goodbye
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(no subject) [Dec. 8th, 2009|11:32 am]
Lauren Elyce
[Current Music |Daniel - Bat for Lashes]

Getting some sweet gym muscles.

In other news, I'm working 99% of the time (even weekends)
I'm due at work real soon but its pouring outside, I have no umbrella..and I have to walk to the bus stop so I'm drinking berry tea, smoking and reading a book called
'Feel Good, Little Changes to Simplify Your Life'

I invited my (ex) best friend to a beach party this weekend, she replied with
'thanks so much for getting me a ticket, cool. ive put on like 100 kilos tho!!!'

There is no way in hell I'm going down this road with her. I'm doing just fine on my own.

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its the wrong time of day [Nov. 21st, 2009|01:42 am]
Lauren Elyce
[Current Music |lykke li- time flies]

Things I am doing right now
drinking chamomile
using the last of my nag champa
making a setlist for oliver and I to sing
smoking a fresh pack
getting leather stains on my palms from my new journal (thankyou jordan)

Things I will do tomorrow
not wash my hair
get a chai latte from work
buy fresh singapore orchids
read the newspaper (i never do this, but always want to)
dance under the sunshine with jordan
say goodbye to mama
write a letter to hayley

I like lists, and plans. They make me feel like I have somewhere to go.
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never let me go until you've told me, told me what I want to know [Nov. 15th, 2009|02:39 pm]
Lauren Elyce
[Current Music |Mel Carter]

Oh I'm hanging high
Oh won't you let me down
Back where I started at
You know I'm a little lost

& when it hurts the most
I push a little more
I'm back where I started at
You know I'm a little lost

I keep thinking about booking those tickets to Adelaide and not coming back. It keeps running through my head, little plans,
getting a prescription
booking flights, a hotel..maybe not even a hotel
get someone to drive me to the airport
fly over, nobody notices people on a plane because they're all going to/away from
get out at the airport
look at everything breathe it in breathe it out
just dont come back.

and I'm a little taken by surprise at these thoughts, I didn't really know I'd ever be back here. I can't decide if its better or worse than before; I'm older and I know better, I know its not an option..when I was younger, I didn't care.
I think I just feel more trapped by that.

I lie on my bed a lot and imagine I'm somewhere else. Busy cities or parks halfway across the world, sitting by a pond, walking through somewhere in asia.. I just want to start it all again. Go where I'm not known. Experience everything I can and do it now now now now I'm driven by something I can't figure out what but I just want to get out.

You know that feeling where you're putting pressure on something, knowing that its going to break but you just want to see how far you can push it until it does?
I have been stretching out like a rubber band for days and days now and I know I'm about to reach the point where I fall apart.

It will just be interesting to see where I run to when it happens.

How do you explain to someone that you're falling very, very fast?
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(no subject) [Oct. 21st, 2009|04:38 pm]
Lauren Elyce
I miss hong kong with a burning fucking fury.
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